Implantation Day

All day today I've been envisioning my two little totsicles burrowing into K's inviting uterus. I'm hoping that they are getting nice and comfy for the long haul! K's been having a good feeling about things. For all those who asked K will be testing towards the end of the week and I'll be sure to let you know the results.

I went out with my girlfriends tonight for sushi and wine. It was a great time. When we got our bill we got fortune cookies and mine reads "A shooting star tonight will bring you good luck tomorrow." Of course I want to interpret this as a sign, but the logical side of me finds it hard to believe in signs. However, I did get a similar fortune while having lunch with a friend at the very beginning of the FET that resulted in Myles, so I'm having a hard time ignoring this!

Although things have been busy with the FET to Kealy, I'm still remembering each day we were blessed with Myles. I continue to read my journal and the CarePage posts and comments. I am still moved beyond words by the amazing love and support of our friends and family. My mom's bff had our CarePage made into a book for us and I love it. I can reread all the comments that people made. The love that flowed through their words could be felt by all three of us. It was amazing!

Hey friends, it's me K (PUPO)

So here I am already almost done with bedrest (I think it went too fast frankly, I'm really enjoying it) and 24 hours since the transfer, and I feel like something magical is happening in there!

Yesterday was flawless, perfect and honestly magical! I can't help but be optimistic about it and am anxious for our first blood test (a week from Monday).

Thank you all for your kind words and support for both Niki, J and I! They deserve every bit of it and I appreciate it! Keep sending those sticky, happy thoughts our way!

<3
K

K's PUPO

Sorry to make you all wait! J picked today to do some home computer work despite me repeatedly telling him how important it was that I be able to blog! He told me that I have a serious problem--an addiction to the internet. I think he's right, but that's a whole different topic.

As the title of this blog states K is officially Pregnant Until Proven Otherwise (PUPO). The transfer went very well! K's rock star uterus was perfect and readily accepted our two embabies! The ultrasound image below shows K's uterus with the fluid containing the embryos shown as the white dot next to the +.

Both of embryos came through the thaw perfectly. When they were frozen with Myles in July '07 they were graded 1.5 (similar to an A-) and they kept that grade through the freeze/thaw process. One of the blasts was fully rehydrated when the embryologist shot the photo below, but the other he said would catch up. They remove the water from the embryos when they freeze them, so they don't get freezer burned. They then rehydrate them when they thaw them, which I learned today only takes 25 minutes! The embryologist looked back through our records and said that these embryos are comparable to the two we transferred when we got bfp with Myles. I think they are beautiful, but I guess I'm a little biased!

The embryologist (pictured below with K and I) was so nice and spent quite a bit of time answering all of my questions. This was the first time I was fully alert and without drugs, so I could speak "science" with him. He told me that he gave a presentation in his former high school biology teacher's classes. I wish he could visit my classes--how cool! My new dream career is to become an embryologist--what an absolutely amazing job! Hmm, not sure that I'll have time to get another master's degree when the twins arrive! ;)

I was anxious until I was able to hear that the embryos had survived and looked great. K was cool as a clam the entire time! I think K is a great anti-anxiety drug because I was surprisingly calm and relaxed the whole time (after seeing the embabies). The acupuncturist even told me that K's pulses indicated that she was quite relaxed.

All in all it was an amazing day! In the last few days leading up the the transfer K's been saying bring on the magic. I am at a loss for words to describe how magical it felt today! I took photos of our day and couldn't figure out why they were so dark and tonight discovered that the flash was turned off. Grrr! I was so mad at myself for doing that! I'm a scrapbooker and archiving every moment of our lives is so important to me. I go and mess up the photos of something of ths magnitude and it just makes me so upset with myself! Obviously the pictures aren't the best quality because of the darkened room and no flash, but at least I have a few pictures of this magical day to put at the beginning of our future child(ren)'s scrapbook! Saying that makes me smile!
K looking beautiful before the transfer:

A nurse checking to determine if K's bladder is too full or not full enough:

The torture I mean transfer tools:

K, Dr. S, and me right after he ever so gently placed our snowbabies in K's womb:

K lying on the bed for 6 minutes after the transfer:

K did pre- and post-transfer acupuncture sessions with my acupuncturist. During the pre-transfer session she listened to her Ipod, sniffed Panic Attack aromatherapy oils (yes I brought this as I used it with all of my cycles), and relaxed. During the post-transfer session the Valium made her sleepy, so she took a nap. Here's a pic with K's legs full of needles:

This final photo is of us getting ready to leave the clinic. K, my wonderful GC, and me, the hopeful IM:

I'm hoping the next photo in this series is an ultrasound picture of our little bean(s)!

Myles--one week old

When I arrived bright and early the night nurses had put up a Happy One Week Birthday sign for Myles. As soon as I got there I sang Myles a little birthday song and read him "I Love You Stinky Face". J stayed back at the Ronald McDonald House to get a little extra sleep, so I had tons of alone time with my little boy. I just sat by his isollette and stared at him all morning.

Today was one of those days that all those with little ones in the NICU dread--the head scans for brain bleeds. J and I were on pins and needles all morning awaiting the news. Fortunately at noon Dr. J told us that all looks perfect--not even the smallest of bleeds was present. Another positive that occurred this day was that they were able to wean Myles down to just 1 blood pressure med (he had been on 4-5). This allowed us to breath a big sigh of relief for awhile. We were convinced that Myles was feeling the strength of all who are thinking of him, praying for him and cheering him on in his fight. I know we could feel all the love each and every day we logged on to his CarePage.

One of Myles's nurses gave him a "Rock Star" award today because he was having such a great day! We couldn't wait to tell Uncle J that his little nephew was already a rock start just like him!
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Tomrrow afternoon I'll post pics of K and I at the clinic, our embryos, and an update on how things went at the ET. Keep sending all those positive thoughts our way!

Myles--6 days old & Surrogacy Update

Not much to say about this day. Family and friends were still visiting, but all left today in the early afternoon. J and I spent a lot of time just hanging out with Myles and chatting with the nurses. I continued to pump every 2 hours and was getting only a few ounces each pumping. I was really bummed about this, but given that Myles hadn't even been given any breast milk yet I was building up quite a stock of it.

I would catch Myles sucking on his hand or fingers and thought it was so cute! He didn't let that darn breathing tube stop him from sucking away. Here's a picture that I took showing how he'd suck on his hand. Myles looks so precious and peaceful sucking his thumb while sleeping as his friends watched over him.

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BTW ... I appreciate all of you blogreaders following along and remembering Myles life with me. Your visits and comments mean a lot to me. Many hugs to all you wonderful people! Also, you may have noticed that I changed the days on my posts. I had them mixed up for some reason.

On the surrogacy front ... K's taking the PIO like a true rock star! She says they don't hurt, so either she's got buns of steel or her dh has the best technique around! On a funny note the first night K's dh did the shot he made a reference to how he used to have to give shots to pigs, so it should be pretty similar. K reminded him rather quickly that she's his wife not a pig! Hilarious!

In about 36 hours Dr. S will be placing our two snow babies into K's warm, fluffy, inviting uterus! It seems so surreal that the day is so close! I'm hopeful, yet scared out of my mind. It's hard to find hope in the wake of so much devastation and heartache. After awhile you start to expect only bad things to happen to you, but I think it's about time that something good come our way again!

Myles--5 days old

Several new family came to meet Mr. Myles on this day a year ago. My Aunt M and her whole family came. My bff J came to visit again and brought us some home cooked food. My other close friends A & K brought ginger cookies for us (these are J's fave) and they brought a separate container of the cookies for the wonderful NICU nurses. A & K brought two books for Myles: "I Love You Stinky Face" and "Where the Wild Things Are". These books will forever be special to me. I immediately started reading them to Myles and read them to him several times throughout the day. J loves to call me and our cats, Elvis & Asha, stinkies, so "I Love You Stinky Face" was a perfect book for Mr. Myles. Myles was our precious little stinky face ... we would have loved him even if he was a "super smelly skunk" or "a big hairy ape" or "a bug eating green alien" or even a "terrible meat-eating dinosaur". Our love for our little stinky face is unconditional, constant, and forever!

It was this day a year ago that we met one of the most amazing nurses, Patti. She was amazing with Myles and would quietly talk sweetly to him as she did his cares. Patti was the resident positioning expert in the NICU and did such a great job of getting Myles all snug as a bug (see pic below). Patti taught me how to calm Myles by gently bringing his little arms and legs close to his body. I would ever so carefully hold my hand over him and he would immediately relax. Patti made us feel much more comfortable touching and helping with Myles's cares. We love Patti and are still in contact with her today. I really think that Patti was Myles's favorite nurse too!

As you can see in the above photo we added a few more friends to Myles's isollette to keep him company. This day was another good, uneventful day for Mr. Myles.

Myles--4 days old

There wasn't much that happened on Myles's 5th day of life, but lack of activity in the NICU is a good thing. All of our immediate family, my parents, my brother and his girlfriend, J's brother, J's mom, J's dad and his wife, came to stay for the weekend. They all took turns talking to and cheering on Myles through the isollette portholes! Here's a great photo that Uncle Jeremy A. took of J's mom and dad admiring Mr. Myles:

Everyone repeatedly told us that Myles was cute and looked just like Josh. I couldn't agree more--Myles was a beautiful, little baby who had his daddy's nose and mouth.