Wednesday, March 4, 2009

A few more spots

Yesterday K didn't have any spotting, but then had a little again this afternoon. It's still brown and very light. Additionally, she's been having the menstrul-type cramping that many experience in early pregnancy. I have to admit that I wasn't nearly as calm today when K told me about it, but I was also under a lot of stress while trying to set up a lab for my botany class for tomorrow. I kept reminding myself that light brown spotting can be common and normal, yet every experience in pregnancy I have with any kind of spotting has been bad. I didn't spot one single drop while pregnant with Myles. I decided that I needed to hear someone tell me that things were probably okay, so I called my clinic. I talked to one of my favorite IVF nurses today who reassured me that it's still probably some irritation from intercourse that occurred a few nights ago. I knew everything she told me, but it was nice to hear it from someone else.

I'm trying to remain calm because I don't want to alarm K, but I have to admit that tonight my anxiety was a little elevated. I just spent the last 30 minutes on Dr. Google reading about miscarriage rates after seeing a heartbeat and spotting during pregnancy. It's actually ridiculous because I wasn't reading anything new and think that it was contributing to my anxiety. I took a few Xa.nax and am feeling better. I'm one of those few unlucky ones who did have a miscarriage after seeing a strong h/b and several growth scans with my first pregnancy, so of course I worry about that happening again. I am especially worried now that K is in the picture. The last thing I want is for K to have to go through something horrible like a miscarriage. K is doing an amazing thing and only deserves to have good experiences.

I'm just crossing my fingers that next week's u/s alleviates our worries and we see a strong beating heart again along with nice growth of our little blueberry baby!

16 comments:

Gift of Surrogacy said...

Hey N

The brown spotting is not a bad sign, I was always told bleeding happens with implantation and the old blood or brown blood will find its way out eventually.

I too had a m/c after h/b at 10 weeks and I do not know how one can actually relax when we are no longer in the dark about the things that can go wrong.

Keeping you all in my thoughts...

R said...

My prayers are with you guys. Hope all goes well with the next u/s and in the days leading up to it.

JN'sMom said...

I'm praying for you guys. If it's any reassurance, I had cramping and light brown spotting on and off for the first trimester. The cramping was particularly bad early on, and I was so nervous. I was told implantation pain/old blood. The nine week ultrasound was good, and I went on to have a full term healthy pregnancy and little baby boy. I hope K is feeling better and that little blueberry continues to thrive!

Meinsideout said...

Blech - I hear you - I hate spotting - I hate it, hate it, hate it. Even though it is probably nothing - it would scare the shit out of me too. Just do what you need to do to get through. When is the next u/s? K seems like a brave and amazing woman and is in this to share the journey with you - which, I am positive is going to be an amazing journey.

Thinking of you and sending you many XXOOXXOOXXOO

Anonymous said...

Hi there!

I'm new to your blog but wanted to let you know that our surrogate mother had several episodes of spotting, which, while terrifying, always turned out to be nothing. I know how scary it is, though, and will be thinking calming thoughts for you.

Congrats on all the wonderful news so far!!!

ashley said...

Oh thank goodness for Xa.nax. I had two miscarriages after seeing the heartbeat at 8 weeks both times. I tell you this because with both of those I never had any spotting or cramping. Now I am almost 17 weeks pregnant, had pretty bad period cramps all throughout and had that brown spotting also and things are just perfectly fine. As we all know, not every pregnancy is the same, and I think K is going to be just fine. If the spotting persists try and move your ultrasound up to ease both your minds.

Sanda said...

I hope your next ultrasound gets here real quick to ease your mind!

Dora said...

Of course you're nervous! Take that xanax when you need to, but I have a really good feeling about this for you.

momsoon said...

I hear over and over of perfectly healthy pgs that have cramping/spotting in the first trimester, but of course, because of everything we have been through, staying calm and believing all is well is easier said than done.

I know after your u/s you will feel better, I am sure all is well with K and your beautiful blueberry...well, maybe by now she/he is a grape??!!
Prayers to you guysxox

Nadine said...

I know I'm suppose to say something calm but spotting would make me hyperventilate (well spotting bright blood would make me hyperventilate)! I'm with you, our GC's are doing somethign beyond amazing and I want them to only have great experiences. It's a hard time for you right now, but, it's brown and brown means old and old blood is good, so I think more panic would be needed if it's new blood, and if it's old then I would remain hopeful and happy - wishing nothing but the best for all of you!

Rebecca said...

No advice, just ((((MEGA HUGS)))) and calming vibes coming your way. Blueberry, you and K, and Josh are all in my prayers. I agree...can't they move your u/s up to ease your minds a little?

Thinking of you sweetie!

Sheri-ct said...

I know it is scary, but it is so normal. I have been spotting for 4 weeks. It drives me crazy, but I know it is normal. I am keeping you in my prayers for next week.

Sheri

Alana said...

Continuing to think of you, K, DH, and your sweet blueberry.

Heidi said...

Niki- I am praying for you, K, J, and the baby. I can't imagine how you all feel right now, but know that you are loved by so many people. You are all getting more prayers than you can even imagine. I have faith that everything is going to be just great. ((HUGS)) and try not to stress yourself out. Just try and focus on how much fun you guys will have on vacation.... I wish I could help K relax too :)

Anonymous said...

Hang in there, every pregnancy is different. Can you move the u/s so you can ease your minds? I am sure they could work you in earlier.
Thinking of you and K....

MyLifeMyWorld said...

I'm so sorry that past experiences has made it hard for you to just relax throughout the pregnancy...I just wanted you to know that brown spotting is "old" blood and can take weeks to come out, so please try to think positive.

I wouldn't however move up your ultrasound, because if you go too early and don't see the heartbeat than your going to have even worse stress...wait it out, you'll see everything is okay.

This first trimester is so hard but have faith in that little blueberry of yours, and remember it's a whole different uterus now, circumstances have changed and that little berry is growing, I'm sure of it.